Getting in touch with your masculine or feminine side.

2026 Day 141. #PersonalDays.

Another day another chapter from The Laws of Human Nature by Robert Greene. This chapter has been probably the most interesting read in the book so far. It was obviously a very important lesson in improving yourself but what I liked most was the consequences of living without this improvement.

The first idea that everything relies on is the fact that humans have divided ideas and habits into masculine or feminine sects. While not necessarily true, the author adopted this convention for the sake of making it easier for the readers to follow through.

Masculine Habits & Ideas.

Aggressive. Assertive. Action before thought. Men need to take charge of the room, they are restless, hot-headed. Masculine men tend to look at the intricate details of an object or a machine, take it apart and look at the tiny pieces that makes it run. They tend to focus on the decisions and results to drive success.

Feminine Habits & Ideas.

Soft. Caring. Nurturing. Women are more passive, they care for their children, husband, parents, and more putting others over themselves. They are not suited for quick decisions, but instead like to really think about the situation and make the least aggressive choice. They like to look at the larger parts of the machine, see how connections flow and have a broader understanding of things. In teams they tend to care more for the overall well-being of the team and making sure that there are no major disagreements or negative feelings.

Now, whether these are solid facts or not, the majority of the population would agree on the categorisation based on conventional ideas. The modern world has obviously moved on but for the sake of this blog, these are the most basic assumptions.

Neither classification is good or bad. People who are passive must learn to be a little aggressive, and people who are extremely assertive should learn to listen to other before taking any action. You have the natural ability to be only one, but know who the situation needs you to be and acting like it will give you an edge.

The difference between the two styles of thinking are obvious. As children, we have might a natural affliction for either kind of habits because beyond human classification they really do not fall in either category. Societal expectations can have an adverse effect on the overall personality of the child.

Boys who already had an inclination for the masculine traits and girls who had an inclination for the feminine traits tend to fall deeper into this. Their behaviour (being too aggressive or docile) are excused which lead to extremism as they grow older. They become so set in their ways that is difficult for them to go about any other way than they currently know.

Boys who had an inclination for feminine traits and girls who had an inclination for masculine traits suffer internally. Because who they try to be on the outside is not in full agreement with how they are on the inside, it can lead to bad life choices or bad choices in love. The repressed behaviour leaks out more and more as the child gets older and starts creating issues.

The Important Lesson.

Some people grow up in touch with both traits, or they adopt the opposite as they grow through life. Understanding and knowing both your traits and using each as the situations demands is what makes a person more interesting.

The man who is caring yet firm, the woman is assertive, yet attentive get more attention. Obviously not all attention is great, it can inspire admiration but also jealousy and envy. Either way, the more important thing is to command the attention of the room.

Any form of extremism is unattractive. This why men who chase the alpha-wolf status often find themselves being the lone-wolf instead. Women who have been forced to reign in their aggressive and adventurous nature in favour of acting more polite and humble come off as insincere.

While they may be attractive to some people, it is not because their qualities that make them attractive but the psychological needs of their admirers. The chapter talks about this at length and I feel that conversation is sufficient and thus I do not wish to add anything on to it.

Masculinity and femininity is not visible only in your habits and actions but also in the way you dress, groom yourself, and more. A man who likes to dress sharp and likes fashion is considered effeminate. A woman who like leather jackets and bikes is considered more masculine.

Outside of the human construct these classifications do not mean much. They exist because of the conventions that have been running for centuries. I am not advocating that these conventions should continue, but they are around in the people we interact with and our subconscious. Still, it is beneficial to understand them so you can better understand yourself and raise children who do not have any societal expectations of behaviour forced on them.

See you tomorrow.