Meet yourself before you meet anyone else.

2026 Day 198. #PersonalDays.

Often in the search for people, one ideates the kind of friends they want. Even more ideas are put up for a romantic partner. The majority of your expectation or wants out of this currently fictional person can be considered similar or complementary to your personality.

While each person comes with their quirks, we still assign expectations based off of how we see ourselves. I have to come to realise that often how we see ourselves can be much different in how we come across to multiple people. There are a few reasons for this.

• Nobody shares every thought that they have ever had. Some people keep things to themselves either out of fear of being judged, or to hide their true intentions, or because they simply do not have the confidence to do so. Whatever the reason may be, this extra knowledge that we have that others are not privy to, influences our understanding of ourselves.
  You could be someone who is slightly insecure about themselves, but when you go on rambling about your interests, people mistake your excitement for confidence and thus can perceive you much differently than how you would expect.
• People have their own biases that affect their perception as well. A very neutral action of yours may be perceived as something extremely positive or negative, which adds to their overall perception of you without you ever realising it.
• The first impression is really important and sets the background for any of your next meetings. If someone perceives that you are a good decision maker, they may rely on you even when you are making a grave mistake. Your first impression sets up a bias which could be positive or negative and influence the perception without you knowing about it.
• The same behaviour can be interpreted differently. I am someone who is very curious about things and likes to ask a lot of questions. This is also the main driver in how I converse with people. Others might see this behaviour and possibly see the curious side of me, or as someone who asks too many questions.

Between all of this, it can be really hard to present the version of you that you have in your mind exactly as it is. People will never be able to understand it because they too hide things and will always suspect that the other person too is hiding something or is running schemes.

Before you set out to meet a romantic partner, it is important that you are able to answer a lot of questions frankly and honestly. There are no particular questions but extremely subjective to you.

We all believe we are a certain type of person, but have we ever thought about what it might be like to be associated with us?

While we think we are a leader, we might be coming off as an aggressive person who is very unlikely to listen to anyone else’s demands.

To fully understand ourselves, we have to meet ourself, or someone who is very similar to us. Depending on how we interact with or around this fictional self or particular someone, we will become more aware of our actions and the reactions of the people around us.

Only when you have truly understood yourself, will you be able to define the kind of person you actually are. Only when you have known yourself for a while and find others agreeing with your definition of yourself, that you can try looking at other people and understanding them too. They too might have different ideas about themselves and will be hiding things from you.

Overall, we as human being need to look inward more often. Instead of just being a reactionary self, we should strive to be stimulus. This will help you feel more in control of yourself and the plans that you have for the future.

I started writing this blog with a very different intention than it ended up being. My initial goal was to align how your perception of yourself can affect the person you find attractive. As I wrote more and more it transformed into another great of how knowing yourself can help you become more present and rooted in action.

This shift was unintended but I guess this is what I enjoy most about writing daily. My thoughts and ideas keep flowing and I get to arrive at conclusions I never would have arrived at without it.

See you tomorrow.